Day 20
It was another early start this morning as we checked out of the hotel, and headed off to our first site, “The Colossi of Memnon” (two totally unrecognisable massive stone statues of (apparently), the Pharaoh Amenhotep III, but who knows?), to watch the aerial dance of a few hot air balloons and admire the scenery.
Then guess what we did? Yep that’s right, Mike and Mal took us to visit the eighth entrance to the Great Dodecagon Temple, which Mike called, “The Great Temple of Hotchickensoup”.
The Great Temple of Hatshepsut (yet another reminder that I need to get my hearing tested), or the Mortuary Temple of Hatshepsut (as it is also called), was built about 3,500 years ago for the first “Drag King” of Egypt, the She-Pharaoh Hatshepsut.
Hatshepsut was the daughter of Tuthmosis or Thutmose I (lets just call him Tuthmosis for now), and his sister Ahmose (so her dad was also her uncle and her aunt was her mum!?), and was married to her own half-brother Tuthmosis II (making him also her cousin…Hmmmmm). Following the death of her father and uncle, mother and aunt, and husband, cousin and half-brother (COME ON!!!!), her stepson, nephew and cousin (who could also have been her grandfather the way this is looking), Tuthmosis III was only two years old and way too young to rule, so she took on the role of Regent to help him out. Over the next few years Hatshepsut began to push the boundaries of career women in Egypt by gradually integrating some curious little idiosyncrasies (like talking in a gruff voice, wearing men’s clothing, watching the footy, listening to AC/DC, using Brut aftershave and occasionally walking round in a fake beard), before going the whole nine yards and shattering the proverbial glass ceiling by changing her personal pronoun from “she, her” to “he, him”, tossing aside the Regency and assuming the position of Pharaoh, making herself (himself) co-ruler alongside her confused stepson, nephew, cousin and possible grandfather, Tuthmosis III. This confused state of affairs lasted almost two decades with her dominating power and insisting that her stepson only call her “mummy” once she was embalmed.
After she died, Tuthmosis III (who was not one for embracing diversity in the workforce and wanted to put the whole sordid mess behind him), attempted to obliterate all references to the first “Drag King” of Egypt from history.
I must say, the eighth entrance to the Great Dodecagon Temple, is pretty impressive (with it’s three massive terraces rising above the desert floor and into the cliffs of Deir el-Bahari), no wonder folks round here consider it to be a masterpiece of ancient architecture. As always the usual suspects (columns, statues, shrines, corridors, and false doors), associated with the Great Dodecagon Temple were also present.
Again Mike ensured we had just enough time to walk around and explore a little (but not too much), before Mal and his kombi came to take us to an alabaster factory nearby.
I had my reservations about coming here, but was pleasantly surprised. Three guys sat in the background demonstrating how alabaster is worked and shaped while the main guy explained the process. When he mentioned that alabaster comes in three colours, he held up each rock in turn while the three amigos chanted “White!”, “Grey!”, “Brown!”. Then when he was demonstrating the effect of light on alabaster, the three amigos chorused excitedly, “Wow, oh my goodness!” It was absolutely hilarious but also a little cringey at the same time. We then did the obligatory lap around the shop and noticed an old newspaper clipping above one of the doors. To our surprise the main guy (the one who explained the alabaster process), is the grandson of the young kid who found the hole, which led Howard Carter to the tomb of Tutankhamen! Wim was gobsmacked (as were we all) and promptly bought some alabaster.
From there we journeyed to the “Valley of the Kings”.
The Valley of the Kings is an area near Luxor where Tuthmosis I (Hatshepsut the “Drag King’s” father and uncle), was the first pharaoh to be buried there nearly 3,500 years ago. Though he really liked the idea of a pyramid, he had decided to break with tradition and conceal the whereabouts of his tomb (correctly thinking that building a ruddy great pyramid would be like painting a huge sign saying, “Treasure below! Help yourself!”), from any potential tomb raiders who might be lurking nearby. So he chose a limestone valley which lies beneath a mountain whose peak looks almost exactly the same, yet totally unlike a pyramid. So, for a period of nearly 500 years (from approximately 1539 BC to 1075 BC), the smarter Pharaohs of Egypt were buried here with all their treasure in magnificent hidden rock-cut tombs.
As a young man I went to the Hordern Pavilion quite a few times to watch some live bands play and brave the odd “mosh pit” or two. After only a few minutes in this stuffy, sweltering, claustrophobic venue you would be ringing wet with perspiration, semi conscious, and totally dehydrated. Anyone who had ever been there and experienced the conditions always called it “The Sweatbox.” But let me tell you, it is nothing compared with the tombs in the Valley of the Kings.
General admission allows a person access to three tombs designated for viewing by everyone, so naturally people search online for the best ones to see. As such everyone tends to go to the same three, so they are crowded, hot and very slow moving. Wim, Maria and I lost about 10 kilograms each as we were herded through the tombs of Rameses III, Rameses I, and Rameses IV with all the other sheep. My memories of all three have kind of melded into one as they became a hotbed for impatient tourists, shifty locals, wannabe models and Instagram Influencers. I truly have never witnessed so many pouting lipped, forced posed selfies taken over and over and over and over and over again in search of the perfect instagram shot that no one else really gives a crap about!!!
Having said that, it was all worth it as the tombs are like nothing I have ever seen. The best bit was that we paid extra to see the tombs of Seti I and Tutankhamen. Seti I’s tomb sure lived up to its reputation as being the best in the valley. It was just magnificent. By comparison, the bit of Tutankhamen’s tomb you can access is not as splendid, nor as big. However, it was just wonderful because Wim is a “Tutankha-man” through and through (along with Rameses II, he is one of Wim’s fondest and favourite Egyptian historical figures), and you could tell this was a very special moment for him which Maria and I also got to share.
By now the heat was getting ridiculous, so we called it quits and headed to the Nile and our home for the next four days, the luxury river cruise boat “Hamees”.
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